Florida

 Remember the old cartoons when the main character gets run over by a steam roller and just becomes a flat version of itself before magically popping back into shape? Now imagine that scene on robo-repeat and that was our night in Gainesville. Let's sincerely hope that this is the last time in our very near future we ever as a fanbase feel that way again, because on this Thanksgiving Sunday when we all secretly wish for a flat version of ourselves, at the moment it is hard to imagine us popping back to shape. 

For much of the season, Virginia and second half of Pitt excluded, I felt like Tony White had our kids in position to win, and there are some real building blocks here to win with. But, this is not a dynamic UF offense and their top three wideouts were on the bench. Their beleaguered five star qb is not even remotely athletic and if you shut down Jordan Baugh, they really have nothing in the tank. And we were for the most part in position presnap to make plays. Then reality happened, and the aforementioned steamroller came on the scene. When the lizard got slapped with a 15 yard penalty in the first quarter and had 1st and 25; they simply ran up the gut for 17, then ran twice more for the first down. At the end of the game a holding penalty pushed them back 10 yards and two sweeps later, they scored. This was the 8th grade rec team against the varsity and that was emasculating to watch. 

Making the massive assumption that coaching "stability" and having not spent $58 million for Mike not to coach means that you will not be short of player incentives. The back four of the "26 defense should all return and are good enough to win in any league. But, as we saw this weekend, only two twins are must haves in the front seven and we need to find the rest of our lineman from the college football genpop and quick. The backers and beef are like French soldiers and are giving up as soon as the enemy is in sight. 

The game turned on the 4th down conversion that was not. Although, I take umbrage with the play call just before it as well. The revolving running back door decided that we would give Roydell his first meaningful carry in nine weeks and he took an easy three yard hole and made it no gain. Never mind that Sam Singleton and Kromah had 50 yards in their four (total!!) carries. Got it Gus. Then we call an RPO and we all know what that means to our qb. He shockingly chose the run option. This play was right at us, as we were seven rows back of the FSU bench on the 40. Because of this we had no view of what actually happened due to the millions of pounds of humanity in front of us. Man, these coaches need a better training table! What we did see was the entire Seminole sideline signaling for a first down as TC crashed into it, but the line judge was having none of that nonsense. He literally was shaking his head no before Tommy even was tackled and as if to defy the Garnet and Gold hordes all around him signaled 4th down immediately. This is an era when officials routinely call first downs when any play is even remotely close. Then, this dazzle of zebras (look it up kids - that is what a group of officials are called!) marked the ball on the 41 (which was a clear FSU first down) even as they "reviewed" it and quickly gave the ball to UF. Wowza. Three plays later, the lizard was in the end zone and the game was over. If we had scored on that series to take our first lead, this fragile crowd and home team might have just rolled over and quit on their interim staff. But alas, that is not our road fate as we careen towards 1000 days in between victories away from Doak.   

Still, this was arguably the best game of the season for Tommy. He ran aggressively when the occasion presented itself and was mostly accurate when challenged. The fact that his A game came in a 20 point effort and another first quarter scoreless failure tells you all you need to know about whether he should be back next season. A huge thank you should go to budding superstar Lawayne McCoy who showed again why he and Danzy might be on the short form commercial we send to all eligible quarterback transfers. Although, if our freshman that we delicately preserved a redshirt for proves to be the real deal, it would be super cool and crazy to have an FSU recruit become our guy (I see you JaBoo!) Wouldn't that just stick it to the Canes who were up early on Black Friday trolling the gunslinger marketplace for another $6 million dollar arm. The line has been very well coached and we visited with the Pettus family pregame and their son - who transferred from a starting position at playoff bound Ole Miss - reiterated what a huge factor Coach Hand has been in their kids happiness and success this season. So, if the Gus Bus ends up in an SEC ditch this offseason, we should try very hard to keep his OL buddy on staff. 

Loved the unique onsides kick attempt after halftime, and that is the official end of my special team compliments for this week. We ran a ridiculously high kickoff out of the end zone for a fail, missed another field goal and watched a visiting punt sail over our head that thankfully hit a trampoline and went screaming 30 yards into touchback territory. Look at Squirrel playing chess. To top it off, our punter failed to hit anything over 38 yards, and our final onsides effort mirrored the first 12 of this season in its futility. I know that right now, Coach is trying desperately to erase tape on his opening 2000 presser talking about how our special teams will be the envy of the nation. But he was not wrong. Every team does love our special teams as it is one segment that guarantees them a win and about 75 hidden yards a game. When he talks about finding an expedient fix, starting here might be the quickest Bob Villa moment possible.

At least it was a quick day trip for your scribe and family right? Well, we were forced by circumstance to have to go the interstate both ways. I can assure you that there was no need for the highway patrol on this Saturday. For over 100 miles each way, we would not have been speeding if we were in a school zone. No accidents, just half of America cruising through the Sunshine State on a Holiday weekend. It still amazes me that the University of Florida just opens their campus as a free for all on game day. Just park anywhere fans, but understand that none of the buildings are open and we absolutely will not provide port-a-johns. The line at the public restrooms in the union were 100 deep. Sidewalks, crosswalks, lawns and tow away zones are all ok to leave your vehicle. There are absolutely zero police to help you in or out on gameday and like every other football Saturday campus in the South, you are playing real life frogger with bombed collegians as you exit the campus in the dark. At least it is free, so you can't beat the price. 

Coach knew how desperately he needed this win to manage an offseason of tough questions. One of the worst UF teams in our lifetime just demolished you, and his leverage to even slightly dictate most of the "changes" that are coming was left for dust on the Ben Hill Griffin turf.  So, a combination of humility and salesmanship is on deck for Mike in the next month. The recruiting class - if it stays in tact - should be another positive building block. Here is what is interesting. If we make the right hires with the back end. A solid GM, as well as a plethora of talented personnel scouts and evaluators, then coaching becomes minimized. Ask Oklahoma, who completely overhauled their back end and in a season, the same Coach Venables that was on a string is a current playoff coach. The era of the Head Coach being talented enough to make all the personnel decisions and still make it work on the field officially died with Saban. This is why this decision to retain, that pissed off so many of you, might be the smartest thing we could have done. I don't believe there are many Curt Cignetti's out there anymore. And when you are $30 million short as every non SEC and Big Ten team is, you need to go about this process is an entirely new way. The most damning argument against Coach Norvell in the past six years is his inability to win games where the relative on field talent is anywhere close to even. So, find a back channel to get the talent back to where it should be if you are Florida State damnit. Set yourself up where in the most talent rich high school football area in the US, we get top 10 recruiting classes every season and start only worrying only about the 2-3 games a year where the talent is indeed even. If your coach still can't win then, hire a new one. You could do almost none of the above if you were $80 million in the hole this offseason, and then starting another $60 million in new coaching salaries. So, we have a real chance for a reset and that includes Mike. So, let's take advantage. See you in "26. It's officially baseball season for the kid!