Duke

Mike woke with a start. It was dark outside, but not nearly dark enough. A quick glance at the red glowing digital numbers across the room, and he was instantly manic. Throwing off his clothes in a heap, he sprinted to the shower and cranked the hot water. Damnit, why does it always take so long to get hot water in the morning?  Jumping in while the cascade was more cold than lukewarm, he rapid-fire washed the head and sudsed up like it was a 30 second car wash. Not completely sure he he had extricated all the Dial off his parts; he hit the dials and painted his clothes on his semi wet body. Slapping his shaving kit in the suitcase, he gently tossed a cursory peck at his snoring spouse while sprinting out the door.  Every red light was a massive irritation as it was 5:40 A dadgum M and there was no one else coming from any other direction. When he saw no approaching lights from the empty roads on either side, he ziplined it through and got to the airport a solid 17 minutes before takeoff. He was TSA Pre, this is maybe gonna work out! He still racewalks to security, but nothing was going to make these six people in front of him move. The 80 year old couple who have roughly nine small bags that they need to consolidate to put in the bin. The husband is taking off his shoes, and the agent is telling him not to...The shoes go back on, one...at...a...time with spousal assistance. The sleepy collegiate two ahead who is staring at her phone with an Adele infested headset on is walking so laconically, Mike wants to hammer her in the ass with an amphetamine shot. Then my man just ahead, who on the surface appears to be a team player with only a tiny carry-on, but apparently brought half his apartment's small metal objects and stuffed them in all of his cargo pant pockets. Finally, his turn. tosses his bag on the belt and cruises through the rectangular judgement zone, and holy hell - it beeps. "No problem sir, just a random check. Male Assist!" It only took 90 seconds, but they were costly, as he sprints away towards his gate. The door is just closing as the coffee-less gate agent frowns at him and asks if he is Mr. Norvell. Yes, I am. Well, I am sorry sir, we called your name repeatedly, but the last flight for Nole Pride Airways has departed.  

We had one thing left this season in the annals of Seminole respectability and forever lore. Duke. Glorious Duke. No matter how unworthy a ragtag bunch of players we assembled, we knew we were going to beat the Devils. In 2003, Chris Rix led the Noles to a sleepy 14-7 lead at the end of the first quarter. There were 10,000 Noles and about 75 Duke parents in the stands. With the score close, half the student body left their dorms and wandered in for the second stanza. The final was 56-7, and basketball season was just around the corner for the home crowd.  Charlie threw four picks and lost a fumble in his first start against the Durham visitors and we won 48-21. Five turnovers was not enough to lose then, but three in consecutive offensive plays was plenty this week. We lost the turnover battle four love this game and still should have won by double digits. This was an abhorrent offensive mess we witnessed Saturday night, and it took any vestige of hope we had for the 2024 season with it. We walked out of the stadium with the PA announcer repeating over and over "Your Bowl Eligible Duke Blue Devils". We lost to a team that thinks postseason eligibility is the pinnacle of pigskin success. Ugh.

Hey, half of our coaching staff had a good night. The Devils offense is the only one I have seen this year that is significantly worse than ours, but we had something to do with that. Their quarterback can only throw one pass with any degree of accuracy, and after the third quick slant, our corners shut that down too.  At the end of the first quarter, they had one first down in 4 tries. They were ahead 7-3. At the half, they had 62 total yards - and were up by 11. The problem was that they were like the spoiled trust fund kid who has 14 tutors and finally musters up a B minus in civics. With enough gifts, they eventually scored.  

AZ is going to make an NFL team very happy one day, but they might have to draft him strictly from practice film, because no-one throws at that kid during a game. He got two legit coverage chances this week, and got in the box score with a pair of PBU's. Peyton and Farmer also played very well, but that entire Devil offense was rightly overmatched and it showed. One of the few disadvantages of being in person is seeing the validity of the penalties. I can tell you that Coach was joining my displeasure with the line judge in the first half that seemed to repeatedly see garnet fingernails over the LOS and ignored the Devils #7 whose big right foot was lined up across the sticks too many times to count. With a Duke offense that had no chance, giving them 1st and 5 over and over resulted in their only offensive touchdown. I also have no way of knowing if that was a hold on the Shy Brown pick, but I really hope so, because that play turned the game around. Their only successful run of the game was the next snap and that resultant FG was enormous at the end. 

There is a family restaurant in Springfield, Missouri (Lambert's Cafe) where they throw rolls across the joint to anyone that raises their hand.  If our receiving corps went there, the wall art would be destroyed. Ron Dugans kids at his last stop at the University of Miami had a reputation for drops. Umm, Ron, what is happening during the week? Our head coach is also a receiving expert. Between the two of them, we can't find anyone outside of Ja'Khi who can catch a ball. There is an argument to be made that we dropped three touchdown passes, and at worst gave up an automatic 13 points if we grab those 3 uncontested balls that were spit up like baby Paul when Momma went for the Gerber's veggie mix. Choices are limited now. We again dump any upperclassman on the team for a kid that can only get better rather than repeatedly embarrassing us, OR we fire a Nole coach and move on. In any case, we certainly shook the already shaky confidence of our young guns. Hell, Luke's first collegiate pass was the dime to Kentron in the end zone. Then after spending the next three series looking like a cha cha dancer in the pocket, he threw another beauty to Hykeem to end the half. Nope, time to go back to dancing. Brock was shook right after Benson boinked one, and the turnover triad came soon after.

None of this is to excuse the biggest Who. If our backfield had Cindy Lou and Betty Lou holding the last presents in Whoville, the Grinch would have got them so quick, he could have given his dog and sleigh the night off. The last play of the game was just incredible. We have fourth and forever to stay in the game. If you are an OL, you do absolutely anything including holding, grabbing, hugging and generally mugging the guy across from you to give your young QB a chance to see the field and keep the contest going. Three of the four Duke (Duke!?!) lineman were on Brock before he even took 3 steps back. It was an insta-sack.  Just add tears for maximum results. There were moments when the running game seemed to be something to build on with the young guards. But, our coaching staff's insistence that Lawrence Toafili never play more than 2 plays in a row often killed that momentum. Is LT only allowed to be on the field for 10 plays a game or we are penalized? Why are we always pulling him for Cam inside the 20. Cam is a nice young back that gets almost exactly what the line allows. LT is a game breaker. More Bermuda Triangle mysteries on Nole Pride Airways.

I very rarely disagree with Coach on his game management, but in this season of woeful offense and in possession of the best punter still in college,  I don't think we should ever use a timeout to save him yardage. He just puts another clip in that howitzer and launches. It is a shame that the long snapper took lessons from Mo this week and took away the possibility of a perfect season for Fitz. But unrattled, be poured in another one from 50 plus this week. Maybe we can give him a game winning chance this season (Miami - stop it Paul - this is a destructive pattern) and give him his due. Speaking of special teams, all that extra practice time finally paid off this week. The fake punt was a thing of beauty and Sweet San Singleton jarring the joint to lead off the second half with a 95 yard scamper was awesome. 

So now that we have missed the last flight for this season, what is left? Well, it is officially a build for 2025. Each game will be a referendum for the young qb's and every game, we should be inserting youngsters on the line as well. Can't get worse there, right? The wideouts will soon be closer to their prom than their degree. We need to not only improve week to week but openly illustrate that to recruits who need to see themselves integrating into a winning culture. The head coach needs to internally start to extricate himself from the coaching relationships that have to be cut. He needs at least two more plus recruiters and a new line coach. But his biggest order of business is to devise a game plan that is tailored to this team and not to this last five editions with mostly Jordan Travis. Stop with the straight drops. Get these two kids out of the pocket and give them easy quick throws in between the hashes. Would a back or wr quick slant ruin the Holidays? 

You real fans are on your own in Miami next week. As you know, that is one biannual game this scribe misses on purpose. Let's hope for a miracle, or maybe just set your alarm so you get there on time...

offense